Identity: Who You Are vs. What You Do
Who are you? I don’t mean what you do. I want to know who you are, without the labels or external things you attach your identity to.
“My worth was so tied to how things were going in my life that I couldn’t even muster the courage or energy to share the truth with family.”
A few years ago, I realized how much significance I placed in external titles. When I was proud of something, I shared it with confidence. And when I fell short? I wanted to sink into the floor and disappear.
I vividly remember one holiday traveling to see my husband’s family. My online store wasn’t generating any income, I was about to close it down, and I felt like a joke. I remember telling my husband, “I don’t want anyone to ask me how it’s going because I don’t think I can handle sharing the truth.”
My worth was so tied to how things were going in my life that I couldn’t even muster the courage or energy to share the truth with family.
But I learned something that has powerfully shaped my life and work to this day: you are not what you do.
There’s nothing wrong with being proud of what you’ve accomplished (or disappointed in what doesn’t come to pass), but when it impacts your sense of worth, the line between WHO you are and WHAT you do is blurred. But there should be a very clear boundary between the who and the what.
Who you are can’t be placed in perfectly labeled categories. Your worth isn’t wrapped up in what you check off the to-do list. Your presence isn’t diminished by what goes wrong. You are complex, unique, without comparison, and what you do is only a piece of your story. Not the whole picture.
So, who are you outside of the job titles, degrees, hobbies, achievements, mistakes, and disappointments?
Who have you been? Who are you becoming? Who do you want to be? What are the qualities and beautifully intricate pieces that make up your unique framework? Because those are things that deeply matter. Those things are significant and worthy of nurturing.
Your identity shouldn’t be rooted in the what. It shouldn’t be subject to how well you feel life is going. Because no one action, accomplishment, or mistake can define you.
Life isn’t about what you do. It’s about who you are. If you want to create something you’re proud of, it starts by being rooted in your identity. Then, you have a sparkling foundation to build a life not swayed by the ups and downs, but grounded in a deep sense of worth and inner knowing.
If your focus is on the “what”, you’ll constantly chase after what makes you feel whole. But wholeness is here, ready to wrap you up in a warm hug and lead you to peace and lasting fulfillment.
Who are you?
